The realm of relationship

Let's admit it, we all have felt jealous of someone at some point or other. May be he/she is better looking, endowed with great skills or just the type who outsmarts everyone. Recent article in a local newspaper titled " Friends you don't want your partner to meet"triggered a series of interesting discussions that led me to ponder on these lines. Feeling of jealously when in a relationship as much as it reflects one's insecurity it also reflects one's love for their partner. There is that hidden pleasure in knowing that our significant other is feeling jealous and within limits being possessive also means that boundless love for someone special. That love that you don't want it to share it with anyone else!
 
One of my friend from college days had a super possessive boyfriend who would go to her college and punch her seniors for merely ragging her. May be they flirted a little in the name of ragging! We used to tease her saying  " He has sign on your back - My property, no trespassing allowed strictly!" It is okay if done within limits like many other things but that special person in your life should not feel suffocated. Feeling of suffocation even with love can be detrimental to a relationship.

Another very interesting category is your "Ex" who is your friend currently. That category is too complicated for many partners to digest even if one swears that they have erased any such feeling. This reminds me of the award winning malayalum movie called "Olangal". In that movie the hero Amul Palekar brings in a child home,telling his wife Ambika that the little girl is the daughter of his friend who had died in an accident. Ambika showers her motherly love on that girl until one day she finds out that the child was in fact her husband's love child from another women. All hell breaks loose from then on...If someone cannot accept a child think about an adult. It will be a topic that would be best avoided for known reasons. The society does not give any "Ex" a second chance to put the differences and animosity behind, even if that person is willing. There are outlier to the garden variety group of "ex" who are able to filter that hatred for each other, untangle the relationship web, turn a deaf ear to the gossip mongers....and maintain a blissful relationship with their ex-partners.

Ladies often feel intimidated by that "Super hot" friend who steals everyone's attention and would possibly steal their man too. If you are teenager that attractive friend of yours could be a threat as boys usually carry their hearts in their pocket... and would easily lose it to a good looking dame! The more they know about our insecurities more will be the drooling episodes. As we grow up we realize( I mean both the genders) that beauty is skin deep and we need more than a pretty face to establish a long lasting relationship.

Everyone is quite cautious about that flirtatious group of men and women. Boy! I hate them like many others. Their agenda is to create havoc in a serious relationship and nothing else. In one of our hospital parties I witnessed one such act. This young male doctor Sanjay had his eyes on his female colleague Anjali and he made sure that he announced it to the world that evening! Anjali was getting introduced to a senior physician in the hospital Dr.Singh and poor Dr.Singh happened to hold her hand a little longer than the usual brief hand shake. Our Casanova walks into the middle of that formal introduction and puts his hand around her. He did not stop there...he went ahead to the chief " Take your hands off of her, I know about you oldies too well". Everyone in that group had their mouth open...he gave this sermon with his hands firmly placed on her hip !! The entire evening he followed her everywhere and flirted to his heart's content. so much so that, some even thought that he was Anjali's husband. Now did Sanjay has any serious feelings for Anjali, to my knowledge "no" but he is that carefree Casanova whom you would never introduce to your partner!

Next group of people are the "Smartie pants" type. They think that they know it all and make sure that they rub it on everyone else. They are out spoken, loud and do not think twice about bragging about themselves. They impress people in the first meeting and make everyone around them feel like "nobody". A good friend of mine has this natural instinct of showing off her knowledge, materialistic possession, her awards from kindergarten to Medical college on her very first encounter. She can talk hours about treating a common cold and make every non medical person in the room open their mouth wide in an awe and every medical person roll their eyes and walk away. These self proclaimed Nobel laureate can be very annoying and it can also damage a fragile self -esteem. They are harmless, annoyance who can trigger small fights in a relationship but nothing more!

That secret admirer of yours...can be exciting, daunting and often perplexing. That gut feeling that he/she likes you but can't be sure. Very tricky group to deal with since we do not know for sure where we stand. Should I introduce him/her to my significant other? What if he/she drops the "admiration bomb" in front of my possessive partner?  What if  he/she acts indifferently out of jealously ? There lot more questions that would come to one's mind in dealing with these puzzling persona.

Good relationship as such is very difficult to establish. I feel that there is some super natural power to bring like-minded people together..." Rab ne bana di jodi" Out of the thousands of eyes we see there is one pair that strikes a chord. And out of the hundreds we have spoken to, there is one voice that speaks our heart's language. If you have that person in your life, cherish every moment with your loved one and do not worry about whom you partner gets introduced to.